Tumblr Thread: The Tragically Misunderstood Nice Guy Named Vinny

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mattstaff
Jul 17, 2021 2:00 PM EDT

This is just the kind of imaginative Tumblr thread that keeps us going. You have a wonderful human being named Vinny who just so happens to carry with him a whole lot of mannerisms that could be easily misinterpreted by suspicious onlookers. Honestly, this is the kind of character that could totally be in a TV show or a movie. Like, for instance Vinny could've integrated himself seamlessly into the infamous show, Brooklyn 99. If you're looking for some more gold from the world of Tumblr, check out this Tumblr post about a dentist who just so happened to know about everything. 

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  • 01
    Font - Font - urbanfantasyinspiration Follow I like the idea of a cop character who looks and acts like he's in the Mob. >He acts SUPER Italian >He always has some cousin that can help them out on a case (either as an informant or they can fix up a car or whatever) and they're all different people, but they're all named Tony >Whenever he's interrogating a suspect he always does borderline mob like "it sure would be a shame if something were to happen".
    via p189512
  • 02
    Font - >Hair and fashion sense are 10/10 >Slugger >His Captain is requesting background checks on him every few months and while he can't find any connections, it just keeps coming up Idk. I think it would be a good running gag kansascity-elffriend Follow Like, he just happens to have a very extensive, close- knit, well-connected family who have nothing whatsoever to do with the Mafia?
    via Vinny the nice guy
  • 03
    Font - urbanfantasyinspiration Follow Exactly. And he himself doesn't do anything illegal, he's a good cop, but he still has the same rhythms and mannerisms of a Mafia enforcer. Like, he only listens to Sinatra on stakeouts, he has connections out the wazoo in Little Italy, he's super intimidating and he postures constantly. He has regular dinners with his family, his dad is the patriarch who runs a / completely legitimate/ pizza joint.
    via Vinny the nice guy
  • 04
    Font - urbanfantasyinspiration Follow They bust some punk kid for something like vandalism but the kid is clearly just a good kid who made a mistake, and since the owner isn't pressing charges they let him off with a warning. Vinny gives him a card and puts a hand on his shoulder and goes "Go to this address, ask for Uncle Marco. Tell him Vinny sent you. He'll take care of ya." And his partner is like "did you just recruit him???" But then they go to that address and find out "Uncle Marco" runs
    via Vinny the nice guy
  • 05
    Font - And the jokes always come from him saying and doing things that, taken out of context, you would think is mob related. Like "I gotta do a favor for my uncle" and he buys a bunch of saws and hammers and everything, drives away all ominously, except then you find out he's building his uncle a deck. Or one of his coworkers has some trouble with their sink and he goes "I got somebody who can take care of that for ya" real intimidating like. And a day later this humongous italian guy (named To
    via Vinny the nice guy
  • 06
    Human body - urbanfantasyinspiration Follow They go through like 20 coffee cups a week because he always smashes one on the ground for dramatic effect
    via Vinny the nice guy
  • 07
    Sleeve - Actual photo of Vinny the Mangler urbanfantasyinspiration Follow He's been on the force for years and still nobody knows how many siblings he has urbanfantasyinspiration Follow Also GOD HELP YOU if you call him "Vincent". Only his Nona gets away with calling him that.
    via Vinny the nice guy
  • 08
    Azure - doncarlosi Follow "You wanna go sleeping with the fishes tonight? .. My daughter's school is having a sleepover at the aquarium, but they need a couple of extra chaperones.' urbanfantasyinspiration Follow Brilliant addition grimsecret333 Follow I'm gonna make you an offer you can't refuse.. injuries-in-dust Follow Dinner, tonight, with my family. My grandmothers linguini is something you just can't say "no" to. I mean, look at this picture of her. *takes a family photo out of wallet and
    via Vinny the nice guy
  • 09
    Product - urbanfantasyinspiration Follow Brilliant addition grimsecret333 Follow I'm gonna make you an offer you can't refuse... injuries-in-dust Follow Dinner, tonight, with my family. My grandmothers linguini is something you just can't say "no" to. I mean, look at this picture of her. *takes a family photo out of wallet and points out Nona* you can't refuse, you'd disappoint this sweet little old lady. ashewinterwald Follow I love every part of this! injuries-in-dust Follow He visits a newly
    via Vinny the nice guy
  • 10
    Font - "Nice place you got here. Would be a real shame if something bad happened to it." Everyone is sweating bullets for five minutes as Vinny walks around the place, slowly, looking at seemingly random things, very closely. Then Vinny hands the owner a report on all the weak points where a potential intruder could gain entry, where a little wiring may not be fully up to code so its a fire hazard, blind spots where shoplifters could take stuff without being noticed, and other things, along with
    via Vinny the nice guy
  • 11
    Font - urbanfantasyinspiration Follow I feel I should stress that Vinny never pushes the metaphor. He doesn't act up to mess with people. As far as he's concerned he's just a normal dude. It genuinely doesn't occur to him that people think he's a crook. urbanfantasyinspiration Follow I also like the idea that his vocabulary is stuck in the 1930's. He still calls cars flivvers. He calls baseball Stickball for crying out loud. urbanfantasyinspiration Follow "Hey Vinny, what do you do with your fre
    via Vinny the nice guy

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